The Elder Scrolls: Korra
by Fatbird JJ Burlington
Summary: Korra was transported into the world of Skyrim, what ever will she do?
1. Chapter 1

The Elder Scrolls: Korra

"Them damn Imperials," a stormcock guy shouted, grasping at his sword, not the sword in the pants mind you, but the one made out of cold steel, that could lop a mans head off. That kind of sword, no, we aren't talking about my penis.

The stormcock looked to his other stormcock brethrens, and nodded. They were about to do a last ditch effort to attack and kill the Imperial caravan they were tasked with destroying into complete and utter oblivion, that even the god of destruction of himself would be like "damn nigga gg"

But it hadn't gone as planned, no, no it was a disaster from the start. You see, they were about to attack but decided to pray to Talos first, but while in the middle of their session of praying to Talos, the Imperials interrupted their prayer session to Talos, and they had to stop their prayer session to Talos to battle, but since they were in the middle of their prayer session to Talos, they weren't prepare.

"Charge! AI AIAIAIAIAIIAIA" They poured out of the forest, all 7 of them at the Caravan of 10. "For TALOS!" They shouted, and attack.

The guy at the start of the story, who said, Damn imperials, as in, the first thing ever said in the story, he rammed his blade in the chesticles of an Imperial, the imperial was wearing chainmail, so he ded. He took a gander and noticed that his entire entourage had been defeated. He was ganged up on and killed.

Takipakiikusuru was sitting at the Bannered Mare in Riverun. Enjoying a drink of Nordic Mead, listening to a bard sing and dance about some bullshit. His great sword leaned against his table, it gave of the huge of death. He gulped down his mead as he heard some people argue.

"You promised!" The man shouted, standing up, his table flopping to the floor.

Soon the peaceful atmosphere was gone, it was silent as outer space.

"Why you!" The other man responded, leaping up and drawing a one handed blade.

"Where is my gold?!" The first man shouted, drawing his axe.

"You'll get it when I make a return! Can't you see?! This is how business works!"

The first man shook his head, anger gleaming in his eyes, someone backed away and left, probably going to grab the city guard.

"I want it now you wench!"

The second man was offended, "I am no wench you… you fribble."

"What?!" The man swung his axe at him, which was narrowly blocked by the mans sword. A fight was ensuing.

Takipakiikusuru got up, grabbing his great sword, the spectators parted away for him, as he walked up to where the action was. Takipakiikusuru swung his great sword, cleaving through the two men in a single great swing. The spectators gasped in whorror. Takipakkikusuru knelt down and searched the men, finding 600 gold. "A shame," he said quietly, "That friends would draw a blade over 600 gold." He pocketed the change and walked out of the Bannered Mare as the city guards were running in.

Korra stood alone in a forest, her homies behind her.

"What is this strange new world that we find ourselves in?" Asami said.

"I'm not sure, but I've never seen a place like it." Mako said, as they stood on a hill that you could see Riverrun from.

"It seems like that's a city, can't hurt to check it out." Bolin said. The group agreed and made their way there.

They walked along the main street when a guard ran out of the bannered mare, "Hey you, guy with the long sword, stop! YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR MURDER!"

Takipakiikusuru laughed, looking at him, "Try me."

The city guard charged after him, but was cut down like a dog, worst then a dog, stepped on like a cock roach. This nigga too op. just so you guys now.

Korra gazed at it in horror, "You! You are a murderer!" She shouted at him. Takipakiikusuru looked at her, "Your point?"

Korra felt the anger flow through her veins as if it was blood. "I cannot allow you to get away with that."

Takipakiikusuru laughed, running a hand through his long raven black hair, "Go ahead, try, make my day."

Korra yelled and launched herself forward, shooting a water stream at Takipakiikusuru. He side stepped, dodging the water, but Korra kept at it, using the water stream like a sword and following through where he was now currently standing. But Takipakiikusuru rolled forward, closing the distance, and swung his blade at her, she blocked it by using her earth bending skills and pulling up a block of earth to block the blow. He took a step back. They stared each other down.


	2. ass

The Elder Scrolls: Korra Chapter 2

You see the meeting with Takipakiikusuru (I hope I spelled his name right) and Korra was destiny, fate, set forth by the great and mighty god, the writer. Why has he selected these two street niggas? Well tbh I had nothing better to do and was bored last night so I started this piece of shit god forsaken story. Well it isn't god forsaken cus im god. Just need you to know though that I have no particular direction when it comes t this story. This is a product that the Christian folk would lead a crusade against because it speaks the word of satan.

Anyway, back to the story.

Korra was glaring angrily at Takipakiikusuru, fire was emitting from her flaming hot average body. "Woah watch out with that fire, you'll hurt yourself." Korra's gaze only narrowed, to the point where she looked asian. Asami was insaulted. Why she gotta do a chink face? This is racist you fuck twats.

Korra launched a ball of fire at Takipakiikusuru, who used his great sword and cut through the fire, and then he ran forward and swung his blade in a horizontal fashion, aiming to cut her body in half. But korra made ice to block it, she laughed at him, "Your sword is stuck in my sheath, my cold wet sheath!"

Takipakiikusuru's flames burst into blue fire, pretty much turning the ice into agua, he then slashed his blade, a beam of fire shot out, korra almost died but thankfully she didn't because if she dies now we have no story.

Korra got up, she was burned, but thankfully nothing gross. "You wanna play with fire?!" She shouted, fire emitting from her.

"Not really, I'd like to leave." Takipakiikusuru said, "But if I must, I'll have to burn you." The fire got stronger, everyone could feel the heat. And they ran to each other, a battle against fire.

Meanwhile, in the battlefield.

Stormcocks were praying to Talos. They were praying hardcore, but eventually, they finished their prayer session.

Now back to Whiterun.

It was clash against wills.

Spoiler alert, Korra wins.

Takipakiikusuru slid and dodged a bolt of fire, and punched Korra in the face, knocking her out. He stood victorious, and walked out of Whiterun, no one stopping him.

Korra woke up in the temple, "Ah, what happened?"

A temple lady said, "You were knocked out cold by the wanderer." She gave Korra milk of the poppy.

Korra drang it and felt better. She got up, "Where are my homies?"

"They are in the companions guild." The temple lady said softly.

"And where is that?"

"Just down the road, young one."

Korra went to the companions guild, she were rocking out to some hardcore metal. Jamming on pots and pans.

"About that man," Kodlack said, "We don't know his name, he wanders, we know he visits all 9 holds though."

The group nodded, "he may be in a small village down south."

The group nodded and left.

They arrived at the village.

"This place is interesting, filled with man secrets" Asami said, nomming on some Salami. No not Bruce Wayne's salami, Batman isn't in this story… But maybe….

Batman stood ontop of a fucking tree cus they aint got shit for buildings here. Nah this wont work fuck it.

Takipakiikusuru walked quietly along the river banks. A women came up to him, "Hey handsome, what you doing way out here?"

"Nothing, just walking, as you can see."

She nodded, "I do see, I see a nice piece of ass!"

He cocked an eyebrow up, "Wish I could see a nice piece of ass, but all I see is just ass" and he walked right past her.


	3. Domestic Abuse, tales of a loving Wife

The Elder Scrolls: Korra Chapter 3

Taki (UPDATE: Taki is Takipakiikusuru, I changed his name because it was difficult to remember and it was a chore writing his name out so I figured I'd give him a new name to be easier to remember and just so you know he is heading to the bard school. So he can learn how to serenade the ladies.)

Taki arrived at Solitude by himself, funny ammirite?

So he went into the bar and ordered himself with some wine. He killed two innocent people for 600 gold, he decided to splurge. He bought some win and enjoyed the wine, letting his sword rest against the table beside him. He took a gander at the area around him, lots of nords drinking and having a jolly ol' time. Fucking losers. I ordered some chicken and it was delicious, like, so mouth watering fucking good that it was literally better then all the times I ever had sex combined. It was too good to exist, so I got up and killed the cook. And left before anyone ever knew.

I went up to the bards college and walked in, some homies were practicing the art. I took a bard playing instrument (I forgot what they are called) and began jamming out to master of puppets by metallica. And then after that I started playing sandstorm by darude. Within that moment, I became a high ranking member of the bard's college. But he gave them a fake name, Instead of Taki, Kita. But soon he left, and disappeared.

You see, he didn't want to be known or famous. He just wanted to get it all till he died.

While in Solitude he went to the docks and watched the ocean. It was beautiful. As if it was painted b a famous painter, but since this is Skyrim, it was made by an animator.

Korra made her way to the village down south but found her way to the college of winterhold. She went up to the college and said she was the avatar.

"Open up college of mages. I am the avatar!" She shouted.

And they said, "no."

And then Korra bended all four of the elements and they were all impressed so they welcomed her in with open arms.

She met the arch mage. "Your skills are amazing young one, where did you learn?"

"I had good teachers, and Tenzin."

"I've never heard of this mage, is he good?"

"he aight."

He asked her to demonstrate on the new kids and she did and they were thankful.

The arch mage came to her, "I want to teach you some stuff, but I want to know what you will use it for."

"There is this man…" She began, taking a breath, "He murdered a guard in cold blood in front of me and almost killed me… I want to bring him to justice, and all like him!"

Her three sentence monologue brought the man to tears, and he taught it to her.

Meanwhile on the battlefield.

The stormcocks began to pray to Talos, because Talos is their god and it is their duty as servants of talos to pray to Talos. For if they don't pray to Talos, then who will?

Now back to Solitude.

Just kidding, Taki used fast travel Riften, nd went in the bee and barb and got an amulet of mara to marry a bitch. Maybe later. He said to himself.

He then went to windhelm where he was scouted by the dark brotherhood to join.

"You are strong, we could use someone like you," the recruiter said, leaning against the wall.

"I don't like being used." Was all he said, walking right past him.

The recruiter spun around and tried to stab Taki. But Taki dodged and grabbed the recruiter's head and slammed it to the moon.

Meanwhile at a house in windhelm

"Hey honey, I'm home" Said a loving and caring husband, wrapping an arm around her from behind and placing a soft gentle kiss on her delicate neck.

"Hey Babe, I made your favorite! Stew!" The wife said happily, grabbing his hands/

"Oh joy!" He let go and sat down at the table. He started eating it. "Wtf this stew tastes like shit!" he got up and decked his wife in the face.

Domestic Abuse is Okay.


	4. A message

The Elder Scrolls: Korea

Batman stood silently on a pine tree in a forest overlooking some bandits. They were having a ball drinking stolen mead from the stolen cups, eating the stolen food on their stolen plate, staying snug on their stolen bed with their stolen clothing, with their stolen weapons ready to kill and steal some more. This pissed of Batman, so he glided down and kicked one, knocking him out. He then did some kungy fu shit and beat the shit out of the whole gang.

Jk batman aint in this story.

Taki stood quietly with his clan of outcasts. They were social outcasts who had nothing, but each other's friendship. In a world that left them behind, it was their friendship, their brotherhood that kept them together, it was what inspired Taki to get stronger.

"Taki ,my brother, long time no see." Said the leader of the outcasts, their clan was just called the outcasts because they lacked originality. Taki nodded, and tossed him a sack with 580 gold. The brother smiled and gave him a hug and a leg of lamb to consume, it was delish I guess. I dunno ive never had lamb.

"I'm going out again, see you later.." Taki said, turning to leave after the lamb.

"Taki wait…" A female voice called out. Taki turned to see his 6 year old little sister. She ran up to him and gave him a hug. "Please stay the night." Taki placed a hand around her and gave her a hug. "Sure I guess"

Meanwhile with korrea

Korra mastered all that the arch mage had to offer her. She went on her way to riften, at the bee and barb. She went to the argonian bitch and said "Hey, have you seen a man here? Long black hair, pale white skin, a sword that must compensate for his small penis?"

The Argonan laughed, "try the whore house down the road."

The korea went to the whore house. The whore screamed in whorror because she thought korea was lesbian, but in korea gayness means death. So korra was as straight as asami, which is to say, she was nomming on bruce waynes salami. But after she gave the description the whore laughed, "I tried to suck his dick so many times but he was so evasive, he may want some salami himself.

"he was in the bee and barb." The whore finished saying. So korra went to the bee and barb and asked the argonian bitch's husband. "oh, him, I saw him around the whore house." So korra went to the whore house and talked to a different whore.

"oh him, I seen him around, he was mostly seen at the bee and barb."

So krorra went back to the bee and barb and talked to this religious guy, "why yes, him, I think he said his name was taki. I gave him an amular of mara. I hope to see him married and have beautiful children."

"Why?" Korra demanded, angry that he should be given happiness.

"If you look in his eyes, you'll notice he has a sad soul, that begs for someone to rip that nasty blade from him and replace it with their hand."

"Ha, gay." Korra said and left.

Now back to the battlefields.

Ulfric Stormcock was praying to some white nigga named talos in his home in windhelm. Buncha' bitches if you ask me, but you didn't. this whole war started because some white guy wanted talos and no one else wanted talos. Aaayyy lmao

Anywas, back to Taki.

He woke up the next day, and kissed his sister on the forehead and left. He was heading over to Riften, he liked the bee and barb, nice atmosphere where he could relax. Nice and cozy. Like the pussy he's never fucked. Jk this guy gets laid I just don't write it in the story because he is based off of me, fatbird jj Burlington, and I don't want any bitches on my dick.

All my life that's all that's ever happened. Was bitches on my dick. I don't mind that, but I wanted love. Someone to smile to, to hold their hand and take them out to ice cream. But that never fucking happens. And it hurts my heart and makes my soul ache.

Anyways back to the story.

Taki sat in the bee and barb, drinking some beer.

"Hey, Taki, a woman was asking for you." Said the temple dude.

"What?" Taki said, gulping down the beer like the raging alcoholic the beats his wife the next building over.

"**D**id you know?"

"**O**f course not."

"**M**aybe you should talk to her."

"**E**ven if I wanted, she'd fight me."

"**S**o, why not try?"

"**T**ry? No."

"**I** say you should."

"**C**ammie is acting up."

"**A**h. I see."

"**B**ut I want to be there for her."

"**U**m, why don't you?"

"**S**top, you'll make me regret everything."

"**E**xactly what I want you to do."

"**I** wish I could."

"**S**o you say."

"**O**h, I wish I could."

"**K**at, get him anther beer" He asked a bimbo.

"**A**h, I don't want another drink."

"**Y**es you do."


	5. everyone loses with this chapter

sandstorm by darude


	6. Salami, best served cold

Taki took a nice long swig of some beer he didn't want. It tasted like the beer he didn't want. I don't think you are interested in this beer, I told myself.

Korra stormed in, "Aaah where is that fucking fuck?"

Taki got up and Korea saw him and launched some nukes at him. But Taki is an American, so the only shit htat got slapped was Koreas bungolo. Korra shouted, "We need to take this outside!"

"Oh, you'll take me home? Thank you."

"No, we'll take this outside so I can whip your ass"

"No thank you, im not into spanking, but thanks." He walked past her. But mako stopped him, "I don't think you are going anywhere?"

"Im sorry but they are out of rooms so I am."

"no you aren't" mako said, fire emitting from his shoulders.

Taki just slapped mako out of his way, mako went flying, crashing through some tables. He walked outside and korra followed him.

"I have to beat you up," she yelled, shooting fire out at Taki, but Taki smacked the fire away, burning some poor orphans in the orphanage on the other side of town. Korra screeched and charge in after him with fire fists.

Taki literally just did a kung fu kick and she fell into the water below. He then turned away and walked out of riften. No one stopping him. But asami decided to follow him. The thunder crackled along the sky, in a forest filled with the mysteries of the world. Taki stumbled around, gripping his sword like a baby, his only baby, his friend right now. After some time away from riften asami shouted

"Hey Taki."

Taki turned around to see her. She was aight, he thought. He put on these gloves, "I will take you out!" She shouted.

"Take me out where? To dinner?"

She shook her head and charged at him, throwing a punch. Taki took a step back and dodged it, she swung again, and Taki dodged this one with his expert skills. She swung again and again, and Taki fell and tripped on a rock. And so did asami and she fell on his penis and they engaged in coitus.

Meanwhile in the battlefield.

Superman was flying around.

Now back to Taki.

Taki was smoking a cig with Asami by his side, she was fulfilled by his Salamai, far more then what Wayne ever could with his Salami, in fact, Asami perhaps preferred Taki's salami.

"I wasn't planning on sleeping with the enemy."

"Me neither, ZzzzzzZzzzz"

"hey are you listening to me?"

"Zzzzz sshhshshshsh go to sleep"

"I think I love you"

'ZzzzzZzz go to sleep"

The next morning

Taki got up and left asami. He wanted to leave. So he left. He left and ran, he ran so far awaaaayyyy.


	7. plug ins

Taki was walking a lonely road, the only road that has ever known. He don't know where it goes, but its home to him and he walks alone because he ditches Asami.

Na na na na nanaananaa

I don't really like Green Day, tbh. But there aint shit in this fucking place. So he went up to the Bards College and played some nice music, blood on the dance floor.

Tbh I don't really even like this story I don't like the story direction. New story.

Batman was the jarl of windhelm, he was the one leading the stormcloak rebellion, Ulfric was merely a figurehead to disguise the whole thing. How is that? More to this stunning story later. But for now go check out my latest videos on youtube. And be on the lookout for my new book, coming someday next year. Also please donate to my , or buy me something on my amazon wishlist. It'd be nice. Thanks.


	8. couldnt get away

I walked along the avenue  
I never thought I'd meet a girl like you  
Meet a girl like you

With auburn hair and tawny eyes  
The kind of eyes that hypnotize me through  
Hypnotize me through

And I ran, I ran so far away  
I just ran, I ran all night and day  
I couldn't get away

A cloud appears above your head  
A beam of light comes shining down on you  
Shining down on you

The cloud is moving nearer still  
Aurora Borealis comes in view  
Aurora comes in view

And I ran, I ran so far away  
I just ran, I ran all night and day  
I couldn't get away

Reached out a hand to touch your face  
You're slowly disappearing from my view  
Appearing from my view

Reached out a hand to try again  
I'm floating in a beam of light with you  
A beam of light with you

And I ran, I ran so far away  
I just ran, I ran all night and day  
And I ran, I ran so far away  
I just ran, I couldn't get away

\- a band from the 80's


	9. ill write all day err' day

break it down~!

"Oracle," Batman said quietly to his ear piece in medieval skyrim, that lacks electricity and indoor plumbing, similar to Montana. His servant was walking and tripped and fell and had a seizure, mostly due to the fact that he was inbred garbage, just like the inhabitants from Montana. But that's okay, he's special, a special kind of retarded. Batman got up when Oracle didn't answer, probably trying to walk again, the disabled fuck. Making the master of masters wait, psh, batman thought. Things were easier when he was giving his fresh salami to asami in the form of a salami cockmeat sandwhich. Ghrhrhghglhgghgslurp, asami said as she gargled it down like Listerine. But she swallowed because if she didn't id beat the fuck out of her because she is a worthless whore. Everytime she got with mako she cheated on him, with bruce wayne. What a fucking whore, cant keep her legs shut. Piece of fucking shit. Batman stood alone in the center of the market crowded with people to ponder this.

Meanwhile, back in the original storyline,

Taki leaned against a wall to some a cigarette, the cigarette was sweet, like the gentle caress of Scarlet from the whore house. Yeaaah, you could see the std's crawling on her, good thing he was wearing a suit, a suit of condoms. Jk why would he touch that whore when he had the fresh roast beef from arby's? im thinking arbys baby whoo whoo.

Taki was smoking some more cigarettes, just kidding, his father died by smoking cigarettes. Just kidding he never knew his father. He is the son of a whore. Taki got up and walked to Whiterun, thankfully they already forgot who he was, so he was in the bar again having a jolly ol' time drinking alone in the corner brooding. But that is what he liked, that is what got him off. He was a man of simple tastes, mainly flat chested bitches.

Korra was pissed, so pissed that she was glaring. You could tell she was serious, serious af.

Meanwhile, in the battlefield.

"JOHN CEEENAAA!" The announcer shouted as John Cena ducked under a swing, bouncing the rope and giving his opponent a clotheslines. His opponent was none other then the Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. The Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann slammed into the ring, bursting a hole in the cosmic space. The Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann shakily got up, but walked into a suplex. While on the floor, John Cena walked up to the robot, leaned down and shouted, "You can't see me!" while waving his hand over his face, and then ran to the rope, bouncing off it and stopping in front of the robot, brushed off his shoulders and landed a punch on the robots face. The five knuckle shuffle! The robot jumped and slowly got up, but hten walked right into an attitude adjustment. John Cena pinned the robot,

"1, 2, 3!" The bell rang, "Ding ding nigga" and John Cena's music played"

Your time is up, my time is now  
You can't see me, my time is now  
It's the franchise, boy I'm shinin' now  
You can't see me, my time is now!

In case you forgot or fell off I'm still hot - knock your shell off  
My money stack fat plus I can't turn the swell off  
The franchise, doin' big bid'ness, I live this  
It's automatic I win this - oh you hear those horns, you finished  
A soldier, and I stay under you fightin'  
Plus I'm stormin' on you chumps like I'm thunder and lightning  
Ain't no way you breakin' me kid, I'm harder than nails  
Plus I keep it on lock, like I'm part of the jail  
I'm slaughtering stale, competition, I got the whole block wishing  
they could run with my division but they gone fishing -  
\- with no bait, kid your boy hold weight  
I got my soul straight, I brush your mouth like Colgate  
In any weather I'm never better your boy's so hot  
you'll never catch me in the next man's sweater  
If they hate, let 'em hate, I drop ya whole clan  
Lay yo' ass down for the three second tan

Yeah, uh  
It's gonna be what it's gonna be  
Five pounds of courage buddy, bass tint pants with a gold T  
Uh - it's a war dance and victory step  
A raw stance is a gift, when you insist it's my rep  
John Cena, Trademarc, you all are so-so  
And talk about the bread you make but don't know the recipe for dough though  
Aimin' guns in all your photos, that's a no-no  
When this pop, you'll liplock, your big talk's a blatant no-show  
See what happens when the ice age melt  
You see monetary status is not what matters, but it helps  
I rock a timepiece by Benny if any  
The same reason y'all could love me is the same reason y'all condemn me  
A man's measured by the way that he thinks  
Not clothing lines, ice links, leather and minks  
I spent 20 plus years seekin' knowledge of self  
So for now Marc Predka's livin' life for wealth


	10. wwe

John Cena, the Champ, was relaxing on his champ chair in his champ house at his champ table in his champ kingdom called the WWE. There, he was being served wine by Randy Orton, his bitch, "Here you go Master Champ John Cena," Orton said. Bowing to John Cena, his superior, the champ.

John Cena decided to go into the world of Skyrim because he was tired of owning bitches like Orton, Rock, or Steve Austin, even Daniel Bryans. All of these names sound like they came out of a porno tbh. There is probably a fanfic out there with these men fucking each other senseless. But we wont get in that, this is a fanfic about having a good time and watching John Cena whip some ass.

But John Cena wants to fuck some ass, too bad he is like the author, a loner piece of shit. Jk john cena is the champ.

Meanwhile taki was chillin' like a krillin' cept' he ain't dyin'.

But hey, at least he isn't a roided up homie from some gay porno.

I don't even know if any of this made any sense but I hope you enjoyed the story so far I mean, ive poured my heart and soul into this story, and its taken everything I had to write this chapter. I mean literally, I was wide awake before writing this story, im like dead now.


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